


The best of bad days

by justmeandmysillystuff



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Anxiety, Bad Days, Cuddles, Fluff, M/M, so much fluff tho, yuuri feeling down and viktor being a darling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-19
Updated: 2017-07-19
Packaged: 2018-12-04 06:09:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11549115
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justmeandmysillystuff/pseuds/justmeandmysillystuff
Summary: When Yuuri feels down, he just wants to lock himself out from the world for a while. He's used to it already, seclusion having been his way to cope for years.What he's not used to, though, is for the world to call back for him.





	The best of bad days

There were days when everything seemed so hard.

Even the simplest things. Keeping up with his routine, talking to people, getting out of bed.

There were days when nothing made sense.

Food had no taste, sheets weren’t soft and gold medals didn’t shine. And, no matter how much he slept, he would still feel tired.

There were days that didn’t even feel like days.

Not when he never opened the curtains, not when he didn’t have proper meals, and not when he stayed tangled within his bedsheets for hours and hours. The clock was just numbers, and its tic toc just a nuisance.

There were days, that were simply bad days.

Anxiety was deaf. It wouldn’t listen when Minako congratulated his dancing, it would ignore the clapping of the entire rink when he landed a quadruple, and Viktor’s compliments about how lovely he looked that day would simply go into one ear and leave through the other.

Deaf, but not mute.

Anxiety would scream, scream right into his brain. It would remark every single detail, every mistake, every single tumble as he skated and every single stutter of his lips. Anxiety would remember, and would always be willing to use its eloquence against him.

Sometimes, Anxiety would concentrate its every complain into a single day. It wouldn’t let him concentrate, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t bring himself to think about anything else.

Thankfully, ever since he moved in with Viktor, those days weren’t as frequent. But every now and then, after reading some mean comments on social media, or some small argument with a loved one, Yuuri would find himself imprisoned by his bedsheets again.

“What happens, baby?” Viktor would rub his back, frustrated, unable to get him to look at him in the eye “Yuuri? Love? Do you need anything?”

“Stop treating me like a child” The concern in his voice felt pitiful, humiliating, and it reminded him just how sorry he felt for himself “I can take care of myself”

“You hadn’t eaten today…”

“I know” he didn’t want to be rude, he knew Viktor was just being kind. But that made it even worse.

He didn’t deserve that kindness.

“Yuuri, there’s a lovely day outside! You can’t stay in bed all day!” Viktor insisted, pulling from the sheets “Some fresh air will make you feel better!”

“I don’t want to feel better” Yuuri insisted, curling into a ball.

“You want to stay here all day? Feeling sorry for yourself??”

It was hard to explain, it was hard to tell someone outside from his own misery bubble just how scary it sounded to leave. How comforting grief could be, how lulling. How sometimes, he knew he wasn’t ready to face the world outside. He just needed to stay for a little while. Stay, and accept his sadness.

“I just…I need to be alone” he mumbled onto the pillow, hugging it close “I want to stay out from the world for now”

“Out from the world?”

“Yeah…”

Viktor grimaced, not knowing what else to say against that, and left the room to his fiancé’s will.

Yuuri flinched at the sound of the door closing. He hadn’t thought it would sound so grim.

It was better that way, though. It was better for Viktor to stay away when he was in that state. He felt gross, filthy, and his Vitya was so white and so pure and so easy to ruin. He didn’t want that. He didn’t want him to feel sorry for him, he didn’t want him to pamper him. He wanted…he didn’t know what he wanted. But Viktor deserved better than taking care of an overly emotional basket case, and he didn’t want to drag him down.

No five minutes had gone by when he felt the door being pushed open, and just when he was about to tell Viktor to go away, he felt a new weight jumping onto the bed and the sound of a ragged, restless breath by his feet. Makkachin licked his face, pressing his paws onto his chest and rolling him over, giving him no room to escape the hairy assault.

Yet, Yuuri was in no mood to complain. He just hugged the dog close against his torso, digging his nose into the curly fur just like he used to do with Vicchan when he was younger. And just when he was about to get comfortable, he felt something weird pressing against his face.

He narrowed his eyes, trying to see through the dark, and noticed Makkachin was wearing the glittery collar they had bought at a fair some months ago. Which was weird, since Viktor didn’t like his dog using collars, he didn’t even wear a lash to walk him. But before he could even find a reason to the collar, he saw there was a folded piece of paper attached to it, sunk on the heavy fur.

Yuuri reached for his phone on the nightstand and used the shine of the screen to read it. As he did, he outlined his first smile of the day:

_“The world misses you already”_

He chewed on his lip, his lip that had betrayed him, that had made him grin when in reality he didn’t feel like grinning. He was sad, really sad, and he knew from experience that he would be sad for a long while.

But, maybe, he didn’t have to be sad alone.

He stood up, feeling heavy, dragging his feet all the way to the living room, only to find his fiancé sitting on the couch, knees pressed against his chest and a sour look on his face. A sour look, that suddenly turned so sweet as he saw Yuuri come in.

Without saying a word, Yuuri sat down and rested his head on his shoulder, sighing contently when he felt Viktor’s hands wrapping around him, warmer than bed sheets, pulling him close.

“It’s ok if you are sad” He felt the vibration of his voice on his chest, and felt the press of soft lips on top of his messy hair “We can be sad together, if you want”

Yuuri hummed, rubbing his face against the coziness of his embrace, wanting to melt onto it, disintegrate between his arms.

“I was wrong” he murmured, closing his eyes, inhaling deeply “I don’t want to be away from the world”

“You don’t?”

“You are my world, Vitya. And I never want to be apart from you”

Viktor felt his chest burning, overwhelmed with utter adoration, as he let his body fall onto the soft cushions of the couch and he dragged Yuuri with him, cuddling against him, hugging him close.

Makkachin didn’t want to stay out of the lovely moment, apparently, and he jumped on top of them, bringing out a laugh from them both. Yuuri shifted his body so that the dog could join the hug, and took the hand that wasn’t hugging Viktor to pet the brown fur.

Yes, there was a nice day outside. Yes, he was wasting the sun by staying there, locked in his apartment. Yes, he was tired and lazy and feeling like shit. And yes, he was still having a bad day.

But just like that, tangled in a ball of limbs and fur, just how bad could a bad day be?

**Author's Note:**

> This was a request for my tumblr blog: life-love-and-alcohol.  
> See you there if you have any requests for me!
> 
> Thanks for reading!!! *disappears in a cloud of dust*


End file.
